Dear Fibroid, I think I am Ready

Prelude: We sometimes don’t realize that it isn’t only bad food or health choices that manifests chronic disease and growth. We forget that the emotions and states we chose to invest in will greatly affect our bodies, because our bodies are amazing and will do whatever it can to keep balance and survive.

I finally opened up the medical packet I needed to look through, fill up and return. Day by day as I work with wonderful people I get more and more ready for the surgery. It will be a very emotional journey for sure.

The fibroid(s) represent a blow to the female ego which is true in my case. Severe lack of self-love, the disability to keep seeking proofs that I am unlovable has led me to destroy multiple great relationships and attracted some abusive partners. My body finally tried to keep me alive by creating fibroid(s) to hold all that emotion in as I heal.

My past 3 years have been all about that. The health coach training, business training, friendships, new relationships, etc were all about that. To finally culminate to moment of my surgery, letting all of that go.

Today, I filed my taxes, renewed my license and paid random bills. Finally getting to the packet, I opened it nonchalantly like it was no big deal when in fact I had been avoiding it since it arrived.

I felt nothing. No excitement, but no anxiety either. I think… I am finally free from the hurt and fear. I am grateful for the fibroids that protected me and took all the brunt and craziness while I heal emotionally, internally.

To my fibroid(s), 2 months from now, I will say thank you for being there and allowing me to survive, and goodbye soon my friend.

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